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Dealing with the Outcome of Divorce

23rd May 2011
By dbuck5892 in Divorce
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Everybody has heard the statistic that fifty percent of all marriages end up in divorce, the statistic is not only alarming because of the amount of failed marriages but the amount of people out there who are going through such a hard time. Anybody who has been involved in a break up or around someone who has gone through a divorce knows that it can cause severe emotional and sometimes physical pain. How you deal with this pain and suffering could determine the rest of your life or at the very least your immediate future.

One of the first steps in dealing with the aftermath of a break up is to understand that you do not have control over the feelings or actions of another person. No matter what your former spouse says or does you cannot control it and for all intent and purposes it does not affect your life and how you should go on living it. Remember that you only have control over yourself and that what others say and do can be painful there is nothing you can do to control it. The best revenge is to go and live a happier and healthier life without them.

To live a happier and healthier life there is usually a grieving process that happens after a divorce. Itís normal to have lots of ups and downs, and feel many conflicting emotions, including anger, resentment, sadness, relief, fear, and confusion. Itís important to identify and acknowledge these feelings. While these emotions will often be painful, trying to suppress or ignore them will only prolong the grieving process. It is often difficult for someone going through a divorce to talk about their actual feelings with other people; it is a very important step to someone to confide in while going through a divorce. Remember not to dwell on the negative feelings or to over-analyze the situation. Getting stuck in hurtful feelings like blame, anger, and resentment will rob you of valuable energy and prevent you from healing and moving forward.

Try not to dwell on who is to blame or beat yourself up over any mistakes you might have made during your relationship. You need to look at the positives you can view this relationship as a way to learn more about yourself. If you can look back in an objective way you can learn from your mistakes and use it to empower you as you move forward in your happier and healthier life.

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